Shine recently posted an article titled 5 Signs You are Dating a Real Man. Apparently, if your man doesn’t “get annoyed”…
Let’s just stop right there, shall we? Have you ever met a man who NEVER gets annoyed?
But seriously, this article is actually very useful. Why? Because if you ever meet a nonreal (aka fictional) man, you need to throw him away. You just do. (Begone!) They aren’t worth your time and your relationship will never be fulfilling. :firm nod: And I, wonderful person that I am, am here to help you spot the signs of those fictional men.
Stays sweet. All. The. Time. Whether you interrupt him, call him names, or step on his insole, he will always smile and tell you how wonderful you are. He might use words like “golly gee whillikers” and drink milk during Happy Hour. In fact, he might not understand the concept of limiting your happiness to one hour. Fly away. Far, far away.
Can read your mind (or at least, your feelings). On the surface, this may not seem like a bad thing, but trust me, it is. He will search your feelings until you beg for mercy (and you will always be at his mercy). He can argue circles around you, and you’ll wonder why you never win. He’ll know where you are even before you do. Run, unless you want your relationship to choke.
Can’t Change. Whether you’re fashion forward or not, if your man always looks the same, people will notice. Sure, some call it a “brand” others call it “laundry day”, you should call it quits. He’s usually a bit of a one-note, too—life of the party, target of international criminals, always a hero… There’s more to life than whips and gadgets.
Doesn’t Fight Back. Life throws lemons. This guy won’t even bother to duck. When the crap hits the fan, you can be sure he’s in the line of fire. There’s a reason his favorite color is yellow. But you can only watch a man fall so many times—especially when he does it to himself.
Hardly Works. A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do. But if he doesn’t make an honest living, he’s up to no good. Sure, sure, he has all these ideas or “causes”, but who knows what he really does with his time. Unless you’re into group dating, this one will miss the mark (no matter what kind of accent he has).
But…if you come across this man, marry him. Marry him immediately. He’s a god.
(Image owners retain all rights. Photos link to the sites where I found them.)