I’d say I’m disappointed in myself, but whatever.
I finally figured out how to state what’s been going on. There is a fine line between perfection and professionalism. I’m reaching for the latter, knowing that perfection is a myth. But every time I think I’ve hit it, someone finds something else that’s wrong. (The latest is TO BE = wrong wrong wrong/do not use at all costs.)
The editing is in shambles. Chapter 27 is currently broken all over my computer and in desperate need of a rebuild. Chaps 28-33 await the same fate. They need it. And I have big plans to fix things and answer questions my 1 amazing critique found. Big plans. And no motivation. None. Not since February have I seen forward motion in this area that doesn’t look like I’m writing the next See Spot Run.
Chapters 1 and 2 have been reworked so many times that I’m not even sure they’re from the same story anymore. Chapters 3 to 9 have been gone over sixteen billion times and desperately need some more editing. Chapters 10 to 22 could use a lot of work. I’ve got notes up the ying yang—these after the huge list of changes I already made. Chapters 23-26 should have been perfect…should have been.
And in all of this, I simply wish for a mentor, a person who can take my novel and help me (correctly) apply what I’ve learned. Erm, not going to happen. Stop dreaming, writer.
Since this is November. I decided to do Nano again to help me get back into the story. I got 3700 words before life got in the way. This sucks. I used to know how to write before I discovered the rules.
All of this may sound like I’m depressed as hell. I’m honestly not. I’m just stating the facts, and they don’t look good. I do (should) have the next two days to just write. We’ll see how that goes.